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Monthly Archives: May 2010

I’m in a forest and seeing a buck through a wall of tangled branches.  Every time it moves, the branches between us create an illusion of a new pair of antlers on the animal’s head; it is as if it is moving with with the purpose of doing this.  But then it advances towards me, I think, and I am armed with a gun.  I sense danger from this animal and back up.  I think that I started to shoot at it, and it doesn’t die right away.  I shoot several times, and there are more animals attacking me; I think that they are more deer, but I am not sure.  Wolves also appear and start to advance me with the intent to do violence, the same as the buck.  I shoot many of them, and it takes more bullets than it should.  Finally, there is one that gets quite close to me and manages to overcome me.  I can’t remember whether or not I die, but he is over top of me and I am unable to defend myself.  Throughout this period, although I cannot see much of the sky properly, I can see bits of white through the enmeshed branches and treetops, so I assume that it is daytime outside of the forest.

The next part that I remember, I am inside a darkly-lit interior that is divided into two rooms, and attached to a larger building.  There is another character nearby that I am aware of, and I think we are partners.  There are others that I can perceive as being either part of our family, or the other characters’, or just somewhere in the adjacent building… or even just in our immediate plans for the future?  Either way, there we are, and I believe the two of us are working on a project that involves calculations (mathematics), planning, or interpretation of something such as what you might imagine archaeologists are partnered together to work on ‘projects’ are.  In the adjacent room, along all the walls there are statues of Egyptian gods and goddesses, all seated that I can remember, and lit dimly, reminiscent of what the interior of an Egyptian temple or tomb would be like.  I’m having trouble remembering whether or not I saw one of them open their mouths.  Many, if not all of them, had animal heads.

I also then remember this room becoming full of activity.  It was full of animals that were privy to each other’s thoughts and characters, but were unable to communicate in that much to the humans present (such as the two aforementioned humans).  I’m having trouble remembering how the next part played out, now, but:

There was a particular animal that was blamed for something, and it’s role in the group, including the humans, seemed like the ‘pet dog’, or the animal that behaved that way as interpreted by the humans; it was sentenced to ‘sleeping outside’, I think, or had the likeness of that kind of consequence.  The longer room that used to house the god-statues was becoming more and more like the outside.  It was night outside, and there was grass on the ground.  At times, my POV was there outside and I could see through the wall, into the room with the animals and the people.  This little ‘dog’ was actually dog-shaped and behave like a dog, but was not any kind of animal that I can identify now as being from my regular, waking world.  As it was being ‘sentenced’, I was drawn to engage it and play with it.  I was reprimanded I believe, because it was ‘inappropriate’ to reward the animal for misbehaving.  However, I continued to want to play with it.  The humans left then.  The dog and I ran around for a short period, and then I laid down.  I felt the dog approach me kindly, and pull my hood over my head?  I think I was then falling asleep.

I recall watching my mother lay out a package of gifts that she had bought for her ex, and was presenting it to him.  One of them was an interesting kind of sleeping bag: it’s bottom was made from a special material and was designed in a special configuration.  It was shaped in an unusual way as well.  I was quite impressed by it.  I believe her ex was exhibiting appreciative sentiments as well, which is unlike what I have seen of him in these situations in the past.

My mother presented me with a large, folded card that had come in the mail from an ‘old penpal’, a girl from Japan, whom I had apparently hosted before.  There were many pages in it, some pictures, and occasionally also text.  I recall one page, typed with large Roman-style font:

“Perhaps Dionysos, Bastet & Dionysos could have existed, but I could not.”

Now, I may not be remembering this correctly, but as I read it, I understood right away that my mother had informed this girl of my recent troubles with the figures named in this quote.  I also do not think I am recalling the text perfectly as it was in the dream, but I had the impression that it was expressing gratitude or appreciation for having had the opportunity to forge our relationship.  I no longer understand why I interpreted it this way, actually; now I’m not so sure what she meant at all, but I did sense kindness and warmth in her card.  I also remember that it felt kind of Christmas-themed, or winter-holiday-themed, maybe.

I am going to buy whatever it takes to remember more of my dreams.  This isn’t enough.  I can feel that there is so much more I’m having trouble getting out into words.

I was preparing to go away on a long trip with 2 other girls, whom were better friends with each other than they were with me, across a sea.  The night before we were to leave, we were preparing on the upstairs level of a residence, someone’s home, and there was wood on the walls and the ceiling and such.  These girls’ personalities were friendly and kind of geeky, but overall pleasant.  My mother was there and was aware of my going away on this trip.

We embarked on our journey, and I recall seeing wide open sky and a vast, blue-green sea.  We didn’t get very far before we were eddied by something along the way.  I remember interacting with my mother, also, at which point I became separated from my two travel-mates.  I was swimming, too: traveling without a boat, and I can’t recall that we had a boat in the first place.

There were a few islands that I remember as well.  As I was on one, I looked all across my surroundings in all directions.  I saw a particular, natural rock formation which was at least 50′ high and 60% submerged underwater, however I could see through the water, which was crystal-clear.  The rock formations were curved around in a semi-circle and were like abandoned slabs with arches cut out in the middle.

I also recall seeing either a boat or not, but there was something large in the water that was being affected by something that the dream called a “tide pool”: a “tide pool” was actually a black shadow, mostly circular, enclosed with a light-coloured border, that traversed the ocean as if some breed of disease or creature or natural disaster.  It swallowed whatever it encountered, like a black hole.  There was another kind of danger that was similar in threat-level, but I don’t recall it.  I was swimming away, having witnessed something else that met its end at the hands of ocean-black-hole.

For some reason, I felt it true that if I didn’t want to be swallowed by the black hole, I should say so, and demonstrate by my body language as much as I could while swimming so furiously.  Actually, I didn’t believe it 100%, but I wanted to believe it and somewhere, something inside of me thought that it “could” be true.  So I smacked the surface of the water and came within inches of one such black hole; its border was organic and moved continuously, coming close so that I could see it, and I thought it resembled something that both moved on the upper-most surface of the water but that its movement was of something that had to be under the surface, too.  It was solid black.  I did manage to escape.

As I swam around in the ocean, I sensed that there were many, expanding black holes in the ocean that I was now stuck in.  I did not perceive a way to save myself.  The world shrunk suddenly, and instead of being in the open air, I was in an enclosed room that had the air of a residential home, or a cluttered, make-shift ballroom.  At any rate, it was completely flooded, and I was now a woman whom I know in my waking reality to be a friend of my mothers.

There was a man there, whom reminds me now of an ex of my mothers, whom I find to be a nice enough person.  He was quite  young and attractive, and had some romantic history with me.  In fact, we started engaging each other sexually almost immediately.  He addressed me for a few minutes, and then I made to give him oral sex, and then I woke up.  I don’t often dream about sex, and especially not this much in plain sequence that makes it easy to translate into normal memories that can be described simply.

I saw a blonde girl at first, while I or she was viewing a character called “Orion” and his dog, like the mythological hunter.  We witnessed a few of his exploits, but I do not recall this part of the dream very well at all, so I can’t be sure.  They involved some kind of tragedy.  Eventually, I perceived a strong sadness and then I saw his image fly up and get sealed into, or onto, a very tall statue like the Statue of Liberty, which was being viewed by many people, including the girl, at its foot, and I understood this to signal a “Fast-forward” to the present day.  The statue seemed to be a symbol that connected the distant past with the present day.  The girl had something multicoloured on her: I think it was a belt or necklace with beads of each colour of the rainbow.

She was going to summon Orion in the presence of the “God” of monotheistic belief systems (THE  “One” God) as well as the god of death, and the outcome would depend upon the reactions of the One-God and the Death-God at the end of the summoning.  It was a situation charged with nervousness, but I can’t remember what the purpose to the event was.  I remember hearing someone’s description of the ONE God as being the “great one” that fought and defeated many others or other people.  It was spoken of with great fear and caution.  It was almost a warning description, as if we were about to enter a hazardous zone.  I felt like I was entering an area with fallen telephone wires.

She brought a couple of pieces of paper which would be important tools in the summoning of Orion.  They were simple drawings on rectangles of paper (they seemed crude, as if they had been drawn on lined loose leaf and then cut out with a pair of scissors), two pieces I believe: thin, black lines that made basic, geometrical diagrams.  She would arrange them on top of one another in a special arrangement when carrying out the summoning.

We were at the foot of a mountain.  There were sparse coniferous trees, and the ground was of dark soil.  There was a narrow, gravel path leading up the mountain, and I recall that the weather was cool and that the sky might have been darkish, like the weather is in October.  I saw the gods in the air: of the One-God, I saw that he was mostly white with black lines and that on him, there was a black crescent and that he also had minimal other colours; and of the Death God, I only recall that he was mostly various shades of black.  I remembering sensing that neither of them could be read well, but that they were generally dissatisfied.  I wasn’t sure what they would do and I was slightly afraid, feeling powerless over their apparent superciliousness.  Orion’s suffering was not impressing them.

Then I saw that I was the end of the lane in which I live, in the back of a row of apartment buildings.  I was with Julia I think.  There we saw our neighbours, or a woman whom I don’t recognize now, but in the dream was the caregiver of a severely unruly (I think he is autistic) child.  She was taking her child for a walk around the building to get his energy out.  She was suggesting crazy body movements for him to imitate for fun, to get more of his energy out, since the walk didn’t seem to cause much exertion.  I watched her playfully, but violently and suddenly, throw him onto the ground at one point, while a social services worker was watching with a clipboard, and I was unsure of whether or not she had hurt him.  No one took notice though, so I didn’t say anything.  They disappeared around the corner and one of the social services workers (a new one) approached me while I sat on a tree branch, very near to the undercover parking entrance to one of the buildings I live beside.

We commented to each other about how the boy could be heard screaming but not his parents, and that this was a very interesting point of information that I took to be a tribute to his parents’ patience, that they were able caregivers.  She agreed.  Then I was accidentally pushed inside the undercover parking as the door came down and I had to duck underneath; she assisted me in coming out right away, while I was somehow still very close to the ceiling, at the same elevation as when I had only just previously been on the tree branch.

I followed the lane down to its end, where my building is properly, and saw a tall, blonde, heavy-set and pale man.  He was in the lot directly outside my suite, but far back against the fence that is there, talking to a woman.  He was present earlier in my dream but I no longer remember how or when.  He was also totally nude, however he was clothed before.  It was unclear as to why he was suddenly nude.  I was also suddenly with my mother.

As we each went under the carport of the building and approached her car, she commented to me that the woman he was talking to looked very uncomfortable.  I disagreed but then agreed with her after looking more closely at them.  Then a former neighbour of hers; a short lady in her mid 40s with long, grey hair  in a ponytail, and straight bangs; approached her to hand her a sum of money to help my mother look after a pair of adopted children that she had taken in.  She was there on a check-up, to make sure that everything was still in order for her to look after them properly.  She asked to look under the hood of my mother’s car.

My mother started explaining a few points about the car’s sate that I didn’t understand, but seemed to be necessary for her to excuse.  Then the car started to go forward a bit, as if the brakes were out of order.  She sounded alarmed, especially because she was between the car and a piece of the nude man’s property, which was parked right up against the back wall of the building.  This happened a few more times, and I understood too late that it was up to me to get inside the car and operate it to stop it from happening.

It happened a few more times in rapid succession and the man’s property was completely crushed.  Also, my mother was thrown under her car, which rolled over her.  I heard her make a sound in pain.  I rushed over and I lifted the car away from her and saw that she was bent over, on the ground, and that her foot was very bloody, having been completely crushed.  I was uttering in panic but was unable to control my voice above a choking, repeated gasping of “Mom”.

I’ve been having a lot of dreams lately, but I haven’t been recording them all because I’ve been discouraged by the incoherent quality of the memories due to the parts that I forget.  I’m intent upon learning how to lucid dream still also.  I’m considering doing more research into herbal aids to supplement my regime.

It’s been a really difficult few months for me, so hopefully this project will just naturally pick up again.  I can’t say that I know how this effort will add to my future, considering how many other things I’ve let fall to the wayside and should probably invest this effort into picking THOSE things up, but to be honest, this is the only thing I can get excited about lately.  I look forward to dreaming quite a bit, though I can’t say why exactly.  It’s really not as though I’ve concluded anything about the worth or significance of the dreams themselves, other than it seems to serve a purpose… since I seem to keep doing it.

First Dream:

I recall next to nothing of this dream, however:

I was climbing up a large, man-made tower that was grey-coloured.  At the top, there were many places to step out and be mostly outside, however still within the structure of the building.  Many balconies and supporting beams without walls, imagine.  There were two other male figures: one was young and kind of pudgy, with a bit of a chip off his shoulder, and the other I do not recall at all.  There was also some kind of male announcer in a blue suit, who regarded the bad attitude of the aforementioned boy.  For some reason, we were all up there because of some achievement made by either the boy or by him and myself, or by us 2 plus one other person.

The boy was going to demonstrate something to do with his achievement in a special room up higher on the tower, nearly at the top.  All around us, far below, there was water.  It looked like we were just off the coast of a large, metropolitan city like New York City or Vancouver.  As I looked over the railing, I saw that there were naturally-forming symbols on the surface of the water, as if the rain itself were drawing and redrawing them.  I got the attention of the other two, and reflected on the fact that nature itself was behind it, and thought that the significance of it should be examined, but that I myself did not know the significance specifically.

The symbol itself looked like the diagram of how a telescope suffers a diffraction fringe:

Click for illustration

^Kind of like that, only the width was much less apparent as compared to its length (up-and-down).  They were laid in scores all across the surface of the water.

For some reason, I felt that I had to address the whole of whoever was onlooking, and I could sense that it was quite a lot of people, and that the symbols would bear significance to them as well.  I was howling out over the railing like an animal then, and regarding whomever I thought was observing.  I couldn’t actually see anyone, and I felt excited.

May 9th – First Dream:
I’m in the interior of a large, well-lighted building or centre/complex, similar to the large interior of a recreational center, or a mall.  There were many windows and a lot of busy people, doing things amongst themselves.  I was nearby a ‘station’, which was like a small island similar to a lifeguard’s station.  There were strange trees growing out of it’s back, with neon yellow mosses growing on the sides of the tree.  There was a dark-haired little girl with an independent personality climbing up a couple meters on the tree, who didn’t notice me but knew who I was.  Julia was also there.  I grabbed the girl down without thinking, and explained myself nervously that I thought I saw something which made me anticipate her falling, but I was lying, and embarrassed of having that impulse to wanting to do something heroic.

Then everyone around me seemed to be upset over some newly-developed emergency situation.  I had the sense that we were all members of the same clan ala the Na’vi on Pandora, from Avatar.  I sensed the name “Tracy” as the name of a human woman, or non-native Na’vi and contemplated the pronunciation of it as being agreeable-sounding, as said by a native Na’vi (Turay she? lol).

Then I perceived myself flying on the back of an enormous owl, whom I felt connected with and consider now that it must have been my personal mount.  We were en route the danger that everyone had been reacting to.  I anticipated meeting a great beast as I flew over many miles of variously forested, natural landscape.  It didn’t look native to Earth but then again, it only seemed untouched by man and so very overgrown.

At one point, the owl and I turned to face each other and I sensed a moment of sexual energy or interfacing, but there was no sexual act or anything like that, only a moment that passed; we really only turned and faced each other – I’m not even sure it looked at me.  Then I can’t remember how, but we encountered the beast, which was a giant, black wolf.  The wolf was as big as a house.  Somehow, I was separated from my owl and had to face the wolf on foot.

I used a sword and ran around on the grasses amidst his feet.  We were in a clearing that was soaked with water or at least, lush and vivid so I perceived a lot of water in the atmosphere in retrospect.  The edges of this clearing were  covered with dense forest, but I could still see the sky.  It wasn’t bright blue, but it was dark blue and there were clouds.  I could sense all the expanse of land separating me and the wolf from where I had originally come from.

I had a special technique that was very effective against the wolf for a few tries, but eventually my small size and lack of anything other than my two feet to run around his paws (one paw was almost as big as I was) caused me to be harmed quite often.  Very quickly, after a few blows, he advanced and his maw descended to devour me.  I died, but I do remember that I have memory of the next few moments, only I don’t remember how I got there.  I remember waking up somewhere else, with the awareness of my same personality as I had while fighting the wolf.

Second Dream:

I remember driving along a long road with other cars, in a truck, with a little girl.  We were father and daughter.  We had dark skin and dark hair, like people from the middle east.  I was commenting to her that technology’s advancement was very impressive to me; for example, we or some other people had, with NASA, traveled to outer space that morning!  She didn’t seem very impressed by that, and I reflected on how kid’s weren’t easy enough to impress anymore.

On one side, there was a railing which separated the road from a descent or ditch of some kind, which became some kind of forested ravine or something.  On the other side, there was a steeply inclined hill with buildings.

We veered off the side of the road suddenly, in an accident.  I remember being afraid that we might end up quite hurt, but we were actually okay.  We got out of the car and were in the midst of many grasses and trees.  There were people coming over the side of the railing from the road to help us.  Among them was Gordon Ramsay, who met me and talked to me immediately in a friendly way.

We were led out of that area along a dirt road with flattened, yellow grasses, surrounded by more of this ‘road-side’ shrubbery.  There was a pack of dogs that ran amongst us and ahead of us, each of them coming quite close and I did not sense right away that they were safe to pet or to engage.  They were owned by men that I did not know.  My mother was there.

As we walked up and got closer to the end of the path, I saw a wooden sign with an indication to ‘fish and chips’, but it was comprised of crudely etched symbols to represent the words ‘fish’ and ‘and’, almost as a joke.  As I stared at it, my surroundings changed, and I became a youngish-man in the house that I currently live in during my waking life.

I was strumming a guitar, barely awake, trying to find the sound which best resembled a popular Our Lady Peace tune.  As I did, I was successful, but then heard the tune coming from outside the window, and thought that perhaps I didn’t create the sound after all.  As I turned to look out the window, a group of different adults were trying to enter my home.  I sensed that I recognized them and that they were my friends, but I can’t say who they were now.  There was one blonde man with a white shirt and facial hair.  He seemed very intent upon coming in through the window, and a few of them were even trying to remove the screen on the windows in the living room.  They didn’t even seem to notice my much, or that I seemed surprised to see them, and especially surprised that they were apparently breaking-and-entering.

I was being set up by part of a team who were working with an old haunted house that had been customized wit ha record number of trap doors and was advertised in the tabloids in London.  the team had selected me to be part of their ‘show’ in which people were pulled through painting frames on the walls as if by ghosts.

I experienced one viewing of the interior of the house, walking alongside a few windows and viewing paintings of its previous owners, which had apparently been Sylvester Stallone as his character in Scarface.  As the ghost of sylvester stallone appeared in his paintiners, he animated his teeth and eyes, silently threatening violence against whomever he arbitrarily chose.  I saw the eyes and teeth move in dull grey and white and felt that the violence he promised was real.

Then I was looking from the inside of the wall, out through a painting frame and felt myself suddenly grabbed and pulled from my sides by the people operating the ‘show’.  It was very confusing and I was pulled across a great distance, along an arc in the darkness through the interior of the house, and was deposited at a table in a location somewhere deeper inside with two other people who didnt seem to notice me much as they were busy talking about this operation of theirs, which they had been operating now for the second time, and were quite pleased with house successful they had been.  I wondered if they had been making a television program out of it.  It was then that they told me how they came into acquiring the house – that they had researched it and found it through the tabloids.  being such a successful group of kids, they had managed to purchase the rights to be able to carry out their show inside it.

Then I realized that I had to leave and reappear at another location, a school or something, and that everyone would regroup there.  I reappeared at a telephone in front of a table, and looking into someone else’s home.  I was trying to phone an east indian man whom was invited or due to appear for the same reasons as me, and I think I could see him there, as I was looking into his home.  I sensed that perhaps it was a date to sing or perform, but I dont recall why.  The old man was seated in a living room, and although i was phoning him, I was suddenly in his home, not just looking into, and could see his family and no longer had to talk to him with the telephone.

I saw people on couches in this darkly clad living room, in which the curtains were drawn and the floors were carpeted or rugged.  I could see beyond that there was a hall connecting it to the front door, which was just around the corner, but I could not see it.  Then the grandfather of the family was bundled up and taken closer to where I was, and propped up at the piano there.  I didn’t understand what was going on and I was unable to communicate properly with anyone for a while; I suppose there was a language barrier.  But abruptly, someone there announcd to me, as I was getting worried and sensing that I was just part of the increasingly disorganized nature of the situation, that the ‘two mighty men or heads of the family’ were to appear at this engagement and had to go immediately so as not to be late.  They seemed irked.  I think that they were some father figure or similar to that sort.

I agreed but didn’t really understand as I hadn’t been informed to that much detail.  I assumed or tried to go unnoticed as I silently planned to travel to the destination with the family, as I had also to go, but hadn’t made plans as to how I was to get there, and so assembled myself with them on their stairs at the front of their house’s doorway to the outside.  I was busy trying to change from slippers to shoes.  as I looked outside, I became part of their group of children and family members and mother and older generation trying to get organized in a run-down car.  The father drove up along the side of the road and started acting angry and confused about why we weren’t already ready to go.  I can’t remember right, but I think he either drove off or left us his car.

The mother was a tall and western-seeming woman: she wore her hair long and wavy, had a kind of ‘perfect’ figure with long legs and a small waist but decently proportioned hips and shoulders, and wore a house-wife costume (apron, long dress, short sleeves, etc).  Her face bore a handsome countenance.  She was also the driver.  As we drove the crappy car, I had to be aware of some attachment on the side of the passenger seat that I was in: a horizontal line of squares like a zipper, or trim, that I had to jiggle at certain times according to her instruction: “biri biri biri” – in order to allow some malfunctioning part of the car to work properly.  Everything seemed to be falling apart; the door especially seemed almost ready to come right off.  At first, I didn’t get this correctly, but the second time I was successful, and she seemed lighter-hearted that we were starting to coalesce a little better.

We started to drive across a long field of flattened, yellow, dry grass that had many hills and potholes.  in the distance, I could see some houses and the road that we would turn down to approach the school (again, I’m reminded of my elementary school’s area).  We suddenly encountered one such pothole that sent us careening forward so suddenly that I came out through the windshield and out of my seat, and then quickly hit the ground a few meters in front of where the car broke down.  Although it was a violent impact, I didn’t seem to be hurt very much at all.  All the children came out and others, and helped me up, and I went back to see the car with the mother.  We saw that the car was now inoperable.

She and I and the rest started to walk on forward in lieu of no longer having the car to drive.  She described that she would have to go and get another car, however eluded that her family’s finances were rather unable to support another expense like that.  Despite this, she didn’t behave as upset as I would expect her to.  She said that these things sometimes would make her start to hate fridays very much, and she wished they’d hurry up and be over with, or something to that effect.  She said that she would now instead prefer Tuesdays, which is when she would have  frozen yoghurt.  Then she mentioned the sixties I think, but I could be wrong, but I then also started to see my vision filled with blue, and as though steam were rising before a white, criss-cross pattern like the tiles on the wall of a shower.  I saw thin lines animate the phrase ’60s’, and I think now that it was as though they were written with toothepaste.

I was riding in a carriage; Julia was in the back with me and my mother’s ex was in the driver’s seat for some reason, although he fades from importance almost immediately; I remember the carriage’s interior was reddish on the inside, and outside there were many blossoms on all the trees.  I recall the area around which we drove was like skirting the perimeter of a gated castle.  The castle grounds all around were decorated by trees that were in blossom.  The blossoms were of every colour: some trees’ blossoms were rainbow while others were of only one colour.  I was being told the story of a woman suddenly, and as I was told more of it, I actually transferred my point of view from my own to hers.  It started out ‘perfectly’ for her, in which she was to marry some guy from another kingdom, in an alternate reality or universe from her original (which I understand to be the same as mine).

However, for some reason, on the day that she was to be wed, she did something for which she could not be forgiven and affected the whole of the kingdom, and perhaps also the world that the kingdom was in.  The punishment for the crime was that she was to suffer “3 eternal devils”, but the details about them were not clear.

The day came where she had to relive the devils, or meet them again, but for some reason, she couldn’t remember at all that she had done any kind of crime nor could she remember that she was to marry the man who would deliver the devils to her.  At this time I was aware of my new appearance, as her: light, slate eyes and long, wavy, sandy brown hair with pale complexion.  He would appear and set them on her, she was told.  She was with someone else at this time who was in full awareness of who she was and that she was to encounter her devils presently – it was a woman I believe, but I can’t remember that certainly.

She was lead to a school resembling my elementary school.  They entered through the traditional entrance, and I noted that the weather had turned cloudy and that the wind had picked up in an ominous way.  This other female figure with whom she ran seemed very sympathetic to her plight, but seemed also to be leading to her where she knew the man would be able to find her easily.  The woman followed her without question however.

The two women entered a classroom finally, and inside there was another teacher and the light was dim.  It was well furnished with the various kinds of things you would expect a grade-schooler’s classroom to have strewn about, and all over the walls, such as chalk-easels.  In the center there was a collection of dividers, or miniature walls, and you might expect them to be part of some kind of play-classroom or child’s playhouse.  It was actually another, miniature classroom.  The two of them entered into it and into an inner chamber, which had little tables and chairs and other toys.  In this little area I could still see the windows to the outside, so its light filtered in: dim, white and greyish, like sun through stormclouds.

The man appeared through the direction of the windows in the corner of the classroom, and looked as though he had gone a long time without sleep.  He was unshaven, tall, thin, and had salt-and-pepper, short hair in a modern hairstyle.  He had a black cloak on and black pants.  He was Caucasian.  He recognized me immediately and approached me, apparently impatient to get the delivery underway.  I was backed into a corner but I did not resist him.  Instead, I was in a hurry to learn what it was that I had done, and besides that, was more than willing to accept what I didn’t seem to be able to reject anyway.

He sat before me with a little toy in his lap, that had plastic red, large buttons on it.  I don’t know its significance.  I felt my face was held in a very nervous and worried expression, and it was almost tiresome to maintain.  I was simply staring at him, mesmerized by what he looked like and what he represented, which was a mystery that I was apparently part of.  I felt guilty because I sensed that I had caused great suffering to him and had done something that I did indeed deserve – he didn’t seem happy to see me, after all.  I begged him to tell me what I had done, and he agreed suddenly, and started to tell me the first tale.

As he started to tell the story, I could also see a vision that went along with the words.  It was a black room with many candles in a single layer, arranged together in a sort of circular shape.  I don’t remember for sure, but I think that this event took place on the wedding night; either way, it seemed to be part of some kind of ceremony that had an overall ‘good’ air to it.  I had the sense that it was part of a celebration of some kind.  He spoke of ’60 little spirits’ and I wondered if the candles represented these spirits.  He spoke of them fondly, as if they were his children.  His expression changed emphatically and he seemed almost desperate in remembrance of them.  He started to talk about some kind of ‘little breath’ or sound, and mimicked the shape of what would make that sound with his mouth – a puckered shape, and started to imitate the sound as well.  It sounded like wind picking up through the trees.  I stared at the shape of his mouth and as I did, I felt the painfully-maintained tension in my face start to lessen.  I was no longer in control of the lessening tension I realized, and I felt like I was falling asleep.  As I felt myself falling asleep, I woke up slowly.